i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Let's paint friendship bongs
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
