you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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