porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Randomize
