Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
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