you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
