I wanna bring you to show and tell
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
