Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
We were destined to go to rehab together
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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