dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
After last night, I could never be a politician.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
