Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
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