Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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