I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Randomize
