So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Randomize
