Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
