oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize