bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
