i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Randomize
