No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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