Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
