I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
everyone is single if you try hard enough
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Text me some of your sweat
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize
