And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
