Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
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