East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
