Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
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