Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
