nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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