if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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