Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Actions speak louder than pants.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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