I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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