then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
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