i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Randomize