remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
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