i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
