very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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