love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Randomize
