Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Please don't give away my fajitas
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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