Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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