So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Randomize