what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
