O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I have feelings that need drinking.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
