she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize