So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
