his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
