I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Randomize