I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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