So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
