Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize
