i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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