I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
