I want to stick my p in your. b.
he puts the penis in happiness.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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