ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
