Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
